


The Dokis argue about Yuri's natural hair colour

by AphoticAmaranth



Category: Doki Doki Literature Club! (Visual Novel)
Genre: Gen, Hair Dyeing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-20
Updated: 2018-10-20
Packaged: 2019-08-04 16:07:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 906
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16349786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AphoticAmaranth/pseuds/AphoticAmaranth
Summary: A question about Yuri's natural hair colour devolves into a heated argument.





	The Dokis argue about Yuri's natural hair colour

I am the first to reach the Literature Club today. Taking a seat at my favourite corner desk, I retrieve a book to read from my bag while I wait for the rest of the club.

I am interrupted by Natsuki's voice. "Yuri... Wake up, dummy... Yu-"

"I wasn't asleep and welcome to the Literature Club!" I exclaim. That came out louder than I had expected, and I notice that everyone else has arrived and is staring at me. _Uuuuu..._

"As I was saying for the millionth time, may I borrow your hair dye? I need purple hair for a cosplay."

"My hair colour is natural, Natsuki. I don't dye my hair."

"Oh really? Does the carpet match the drapes?" Monika interjects.

"See for yourself." I reply, while searching my phone's photo gallery for a picture I recently took, and handing my phone to Monika.

"Eww, gross! Get a room, you two!" Natsuki turns her face away from us.

"This _is_ a room." I state matter-of-factly. Natsuki's eyes widen in shock, and she rushes out of the classroom to vomit before returning.

As Monika looks at my phone, I notice MC curiously sneak a glance at it, after which his curiosity is replaced with a look of disappointment. _Did I do something wrong? Does he not like it? Does he hate me for this? Maybe I shouldn't have done that in the club room where everyone else can see-_

"Yuri's room is the same as it always was! Big and beautiful!" Sayori's cheerful voice snaps me out of my thoughts.

"Anyway!" Natsuki impatiently interrupts "Does anyone have any purple dye I can borrow?"

"D6 or D20?" MC asks while retrieving several dice from his bag and placing them on a nearby desk. Natsuki tries to punch MC, but it is a critical miss! She punches down hard on the desk, which causes the dice to bounce up and hit her in the face. Oof...

"Is purple really your natural hair colour though?" MC asks me. I smile sadly. Does he not believe me?

Fortunately for me, Natsuki comes to my defense. "Whether Yuri's hair color is or is not natural is irrelevant! Mankind has been doing unnatural things for a million years and bettering our lives for it!" I am thankful for her support, but there is just one slight problem...

"Actually.... mankind has only been doing unnatural things for 200,000 years..." I correct Natsuki. That seems to have struck a nerve, and now she is furious.

"200,000? Did you completely miss the symbolism or something? I’m just trying to get my point across that mankind has been doing unnatural things for a long time! Why does that have to be accurate?”

“I-I know that! I just meant… The exact numbers, I guess… I was trying to offer a correction..."

“U-Um!! Is everyone okay...?” Sayori interrupts our heated discussion, but we ignore her.

“Well, you know what? I wasn’t the one who magically grew more knowledgeable and intelligent as soon as MC started showing up!!”

“Natsuki!”

This time, Monika tries to interrupt. “Um, Natsuki, that’s a little--”

“This doesn’t involve you!” We shout in unison.

“I don’t like fighting, guys…!” Yet again, Sayori tries in vain to get us to stop.

Natsuki and I turn to face MC. “MC! She’s just trying to make me look bad!” I protest.

Natsuki is quick to rebut me. “That’s not true! She started it! If she could just get over herself and learn to appreciate me trying to say something nice, then this wouldn’t have happened in the first place! Help me explain that to her, MC!”

“W-Wait! There’s a reason why we have so many resources such as Wikipedia and LMGTFY on the internet! It’s the only way to fact check complex information! Avoiding them is not only willful ignorance… it’s also a waste! You understand that, right, MC?”

MC turns to Natsuki. “Natsuki…” Next, he turns to me. “Yuri…” _Yeah, we’ve already established the fact that her name is Natsuki and mine is Yuri, dense boy, tell us something we don’t already know…_

After much awkward silence, MC finally speaks up. “...Sayori!”

“Eh?!” Sayori is as confused as we are.

“...Yeah! Everyone's fighting is making Sayori uncomfortable. How can the two of you keep fighting when you know you're making your friend feel like this?”

“MC…”

"Well... That's her problem! This isn't about her."

For once, Natsuki has a point. "I-I agree...It's unfair for others to interject their own feelings into our conflict."

"Yeah, unless Sayori wants to tell Yuri what a stuck-up jerk she's being."

"She would never...! It's your immaturity that's made her upset in the first place!"

“Excuse me? Are you listening to yourself? This is exactly why… Exactly why nobody likes--”

Sayori interrupts us yet again. “Stop Natsuki! Yuri! You guys are my friends! I-I just want everyone to get along and be happy! My friends are wonderful people… And I love them because of their differences! ...So why are we fighting...?"

At that, we calm down, and call for a truce.

“Also! Yuri’s hair colour is naturally pink, and there’s nothing wrong with that!”

“Purple….” I correct Sayori.

“Natural brown hair is beautiful!”

…

And so, another uneventful day at the Literature Club came to an end. No one found out whether my purple hair is natural (It is, I swear!), and Natsuki never got the hair dye she wanted.


End file.
